Step 1. Gather all the personal items that you and your spouse would like to bring for the trip. Then, cut that amount in half, since you’ll need room for all the things you need to bring for your children.

Step 2. Follow this short list of things to bring for your children: multiple sets of PJs, diapers, wipes, Desitin, clothes, books, coloring books, crayons, portable DVD player, DVDs, stuffed animals, baby food, rice cereal, snacks . . . and this is just for the actual travelling, not the vacation!

Step 3. Hopefully you have a vehicle large enough for 2 adults, 2 child seats, and all your luggage. Oh, and don’t forget a few other small things: the double stroller, 2 car seats, and a portable crib.

Step 4. Follow this easy and short travel plan:

1. Pack your SUV with all the aforementioned luggage.
2. Drive to the car park at the airport.
3. Unload everything you just loaded in part a.
4. Reload everything into the car park shuttle. Don’t forget the kids.
5. Take the shuttle to the terminal.
6. Unload everything you just loaded from the shuttle, onto the curb. Acquire one of those luggage carts. Rip it out of an elderly person if you have to. C’mon, they don’t have two kids and a lot of luggage!
7. Load everything onto the cart. Don’t forget the kids.
8. Take extra time to find the elevator to get to the check in counter. Do a quick kid check.
9. While standing in line to check in, make sure you have plenty of snacks to calm the kids down.

Step 5. Now that you’re all checked in and ready to go, enjoy your 4-6 hour flight with a toddler and a 1 yr old that likes to squirm around, walk up and down the aisle, give complete strangers high-fives, and occassionally hug random people’s legs as they’re trying to sleep. Keep your child from seeing anyone playing a video or DVD player, as they will latch on like a leach and start bawling when you try to return to your seat.

Step 6. Welcome to your Destination! Feel refreshed? You’re only half way there! Proceed to the baggage claim to collect your umpteen pieces of luggage. Keep an eye on the kids. Then check again.

Step 7. Get another one of those carts and pile on the luggage, like a cross between a 3D version of Tetris and Jenga. Don’t forget to shamelessly change any diaper in public as necessary, since it’s infinitely easier to change them on an open bench as opposed to a nasty bathroom, which may or may not have a changing table.

Step 8. Once you get to the rental car place, proceed to block everyone’s way with your luggage while they bring the car around. In the meantime, you’ll have to install 2 car seats in the rental car while watching your 2 kids. Once that easy task it complete, load all that luggage into the car.

Where are the kids?

Step 10. Collapse into bed, thoroughly exhausted, and enjoy your vacation! In the meantime, try not to think about the return trip.